Is Desire Sabotaging Your Leadership? Here’s How to Build Sustainable Success Beyond the Endless Chase For More

Desire, while a powerful motivator, can also have negative impacts that limit emotional or existential well-being. However, desire serves and drives various aspects of human behavior, helping leaders set and achieve their visions. But the energy behind desire is rooted in always wanting more, which can lead to uneasiness and anxiety rather than sustainable fulfillment.

Desire-oriented leaders may be caught in a wild goose chase, where meeting one goal only leads to the need to achieve another that was not accomplished. It’s time for leaders to protect themselves from the turbulence of desire and embrace a more effective leadership style.

Related: How to See (Clearly) What You Want to Accomplish

Desire as a promoter for success

Desire operates at a higher energetic level than indifference, fear or other emotions, allowing movement and ambition. Leaders can pursue chances and strive to push them further when they are motivated by a specific desire to possess or own. Desire has the power to push people away from precarious situations and encourage them to actively seek out better living conditions. For example, exposure to certain lifestyles through the media can motivate people to reach such endeavors, forcing them to shift from inaction to action.

But for the majority of people, desire is a fundamental factor that propels them toward achievement and change, which also makes it the least appropriate for long-term growth. That may sound contradictory, but it is built into their blueprint to always strive for more and seek more — and they very rarely feel content with what has already been done. Thus aiming to satisfy drive-generated desires takes the form of a never-ending pursuit, with the satisfaction or attainment of one objective goal only paving the way to yet another. Consequently, the initial ambition would be channeled into obsessive purchases, leaving leaders dissatisfied with their capture regardless of their accomplishments.

The drawbacks of desire: Compulsive behavior and addiction

The futility of desires tends to manifest in obsession, which has its consequences. It can be quite destructive as it leads to a lifestyle that is based on needs and wants. It can be overwhelmingly bad as it gives rise to addiction and dependency, where individuals become fixated on something outside of themselves. In the case of leaders, this is most evident when they seek figures of attention, possess hierarchy or are in a position of power. Such behavior is biased, as it makes individuals constantly crave attention, own things or flaunt their wealth, bent on the destruction of their mental state or emotional ties with other people.

People tend to jump from one goal to another in the race of attaining wealth; in such cases, satisfaction becomes a foreign concept. An ongoing fear of loss and worry about acquisitions may take over their lives. Constantly wanting more might even result in actions that violate moral principles when the need to advance or get more prestige takes precedence over honesty.

Related: 12 Character Traits Exceptional Entrepreneurial Leaders Have In Common

The evolutionary foundations of desire and how it impacts behavior

The relationship between one’s desire and the struggle for survival is complex, with the compulsive factor driving an eccentric function due to the hunger for basic necessities. These relationships can serve admiration or a social reputation, which derives attention and recognition, which is now seen as a societal need. As society developed, so did the desires and attachments built within it, expanding through civilization and culture. The terms “want” and “need” resemble each other, as they have no clear boundaries. The latter focuses on maximizing satisfaction, while the former focuses on minimizing reality.

For example, marketing in the cosmetics and fashion industries has thrived by promoting a standard of beauty and sex appeal to maintain consumption. Leaders may be inclined to emphasize the outside works rather than the inner, leading to a rat race of power and wealth with no satisfaction or direction.

The chronic ‘wantingness’ dilemma

The chronic pursuit of “wantingness” leads to pathological behaviors, often resulting from unresolved internal conflict. Overamplification of desires can lead to compulsive behavior, involving imagining what an individual wants constantly. This can extend beyond possessions to a sense of ownership, constant seeking of approval or dominating others.

People with low self-esteem develop compensatory patterns, where external success compensates for feelings of insecurity. This can lead to behaviors that are not true to core values and principles, such as the need to please people or have prominence without real relationships. The attempt to satisfy these intense cravings is hyperbolic, filled with dissatisfaction and restlessness, often defined by unbridled hunger. The stress of desire can be transferred into social form through fixation on social roles or power relations, where social control establishes social relevance. These behaviors, while self-sacrificial and beneficial to society, can also have self-serving narcissistic drives based on self-valuation.

Related: How I’m Unlearning the Toxic Pattern of Always Wanting More — and How You Can, Too.

Conclusion

Desire is a powerful emotion that encourages people to work towards their goals and improve their quality of life. It can lead to growth and achievement, but it cannot be a permanent destination. Desire often results in an endless pursuit of external appreciation and accumulation, leading to dissatisfaction.

However, once surpassed, it can lead to stronger emotions like courage, allowing individuals to control themselves and follow actions based on logic. Desire can even be the starting point for a more authentic leader. However, it is important to understand desire as a worthwhile emotion, not the endpoint in the quest for an authentic leader.